The moral clarity of wisdom that i find and all things make sense and fit together, and giving to others what I can. I know longer feel much for joy in living for myself, but I continually receive joy in giving to others. Of knowing myself as a deep connected whole in the universe...and of course speaking with Mum's the word.  :)

           "I thought scientists didn't believe in God?"
       "What people who say that don't understand," said Schrodinger," is that the world picture of science becomes accessible at the price that everything personal is excluded from it. A personal God cannot be encountered there. 'I do not meet God in space and time,' says the honest scientific thinker...and reproaching him for it are the same people whose catechism says 'God is Spirit."   ---Erwin Schoendinger
           The Age of Entanglement: Louisa Gilder

I dear friends, am one of those people who says,  "God is Spirit." 

       

  "When I rest in the pure and simple Witness, I notice that this awareness is not an experience. It is aware of experiences, it is not itself an experience. Experiences come and go. They have a beginning in time, they stay a bit, and they pass. But they all arise in the simple opening or clearing that is the vast expanse of what I am. The clouds float by in this vast expanse, and thoughts float by in this vast expanse, and experiences float by in this vast expanse. They all come, and they all go. But the vast expanse itself, this Free and Empty Seer, this spacious opening or clearing in which all things arise, does not itself come and go, or even move at all.

Thus when I rest in the pure and simple Witness, I am no longer caught up in the search for experiences, whether of the flesh or of the mind or of the spirit. Experiences-whether high or low, sacred or profane, joyous or nightmarish-simply come and go like endless waves on the ocean of what I am. As I rest in the pure and simple Witness, I am no longer moved to follow the bliss and the torture of experiential displays. Experiences float across my Original Face like clouds floating across the clear autumn sky, and there is room in me for all.

When I rest in the pure and simple Witness, I will even being to notice that the Witness itself is not a separate thing or entity, set apart from what it witnesses. All things arise within the Witness, so much so that the Witness disappears into all things."

                                               --Ken Wilber, The Eye of Spirit

            The Self-Contraction. What keeps me from being present is my mental aversion to everything that I perceive as not being "a part of me, or of my self-image." We can be more fully present when we realize that this image is not fully all that we are. In this case our "ceaseless grasping" of our perceived self-concepts that don't allow us to fully be present and aware. We also believe that pain also causes us to suffer, but the Buddha made a clear distinction between pain and suffering. Suffering is the mental aversion in our minds to pain, while pain is in the body. We can feel pain and not have to suffer. Suffering is our "flinching" from pain. If we don't "flinch" in our minds, but just allow the pain in awareness, we don't have to contract and get caught up in our emotions and concepts. Pain arises a bit in awareness, and then fades and passes, like clouds in the sky. Not trying to hold on to anything, but just being, I watch it all in my thoughts. I become not my thoughts, but the Witness of those thoughts.          In this way i am always fully present.